Narrative Essay - Assignment was to submit an 800 word narrative essay, Nicole went above and beyond
This narrative essay is engaging, mysterious, and requires us to constantly think about the ending. Throughout, we are given just enough information to understand the events, but not so much that we understand the backstory or outcome. Kate, the main character, is brave and daring as she tries to save everyone, and those are admirable qualities. New information is constantly being added, helping us to further understand the setting and events. Overall, this narrative essay demands our attention and keeps us interested during each paragraph.
“Ouch!” Kate had rolled on a twig again. “Why did this keep happening? I am not an outdoors person,” she thought while rubbing her sore back. They had been out of the force field for twenty four hours and Kate was not liking it.
“Rise and shine, Kate, we have a lot of walking ahead of us to today!” Said one more than tired looking Mr. Jacks.
His hair looked like it had been through a wind tunnel, and he had dried sweat on his face. The bags under his eyes only partly described how tired he really was. Kate knew because she felt the same way.
“Here, have an energy bar,” he said.
She took it gratefully, who knew how long they had before their stock went out? Mr. Jack's fat bulldog came over to where she was sitting.
“Maybe walking today will help you burn all of that fat you!” She said. The dog gave her a disapproving look.
“You know that I do not approve of bullying, Kate, even to a dog!”
“Sorry!” She said with a smile. She knew how much he loved his dog Mr. Cuddles.
“Ready to go?” he asked.
She put her energy bar wrapper in her pocket.
“Lets go.”
It was dusk when Kate, thanks to being so tall, spotted what looked like a small neighborhood. Small family houses were scattered over about five acres, and kids were even out playing on a playground. She remembered being that young and carefree, she remembered the day when she had taught her little brother to swing on the monkey bars...yes, things were much less care free these days. They walked up to the nearest house and knocked on the door. A woman who looked to be about fifty to sixty opened the door, and she gasped when she saw them.
“You! You must be…!”
She continued to stare wide eyed and with a surprised expression at them.
“Do you know her, Kate?” Mr. Jacks asked.
“Never seen her before in my life!”
“Please excuse my rudeness,” said the woman as she began to gather herself. “I am Jocelyn Fairchild but everyone calls me “Child”. I was so surprised to see you because you were on the news. You see, for every person who is trapped in that force field, they put their picture on the news.”
Now Kate remembered watching the special news broadcast with her mom the last time that a force field had gone up. Then, maybe, they were doing it for every force field that went up. Wait! If it was on the news then her friends and family would know that she had been in one of the force fields! Then, she had an idea.
“Mrs., er, Child?”
“Who on earth had thought of that name?”Kate thought.
“Can we use your phone? I need to tell my family that I am okay.”
“Sure you can why don’t you come in, I can make you something!”
“To that we would be most grateful, do you mind a dog? He is really a real sweetheart.” Said Mr. Jacks with Mr. Cuddles in his arms giving Child a pleading look.
“Of course, of course! I will make you some strudel!”
Child’s strudel turned out to be very good. Before dinner she had tried to call her mom and Mr. Jacks the school all with no success, then they sat down and ate. When they asked what was wrong with the phone Child said that nobody had been able to make call since the force field had gone up. Then they proceeded to tell her what they had been doing since they had gotten out of the force field. When she asked how they had gotten out, Kate told her how she had used the mirror and how Mr. Jacks saw her note. But there was one more thing that Kate still had to ask.
“Mr. Jacks, why didn't you show the rest of the people the mirror?” Kate said while trying to keep the anger out of her voice.
“I’m so sorry Kate, that is a choice that I have been regretting from the moment that I got out. I guess it was my excitement that made me not think.”
“So what do you plan to do now that you are out?” asked Child.
“Well, I know exactly what I am going to do.” Said Mr. Jacks.
“And what will that be?”
“I am going to go home and give Mr. Cuddles a proper meal and bath. And,” He said this with a smile on his face, “I am going to sleep on my own mattress! Home is the best place to be after all!”
Both Child and Kate’s jaw dropped.
“WHAT?!?” They said at the same time and looked at him with big eyes and open full mouths.
“What?!? Ech, what do you mean---” Kate choked on her full mouth of food.
“Chew then swallow Kate, here dear have some water.” Kate swallowed and then took the glass from Child and started to talk again.
“WHAT do you mean you are going home?!? All of those people and you are just going to leave them? The airport's food supply will be running out very soon!! We know how to get them out and it is up to us to do it!!”
“Kate I am an old man---”
“Sixty five!”
“Don’t you think someone should go and tell the people how to get out?” Child said with an angry look on her face.
“Point is I am not up to the journey.”
Kate gave him a hard look. “Fine, I will go by myself, and I am leaving first thing tomorrow.”
“No, Kate, I forbid you! It is to dangerous you are not going end of discussion. Go to bed.”
After the argument Child said that they stay for the night and then in the morning they would discuss what they would do next. At this Child winked at Kate as if she knew something that she did not. Was she planning to help Kate?
The clock in the small guest room of Jocelyn Fairchild’s read; 9:01. “What will I do?” Kate thought to herself as she lay on the cozy bed. Her exhaustion took over and she fell asleep.
Kate felt herself being shaken awake from her dreamless sleep to find it still dark out, and the clock reading 2:34 a.m. “What is happening?” she questionaly looked at the person who had shaken her and it was no other than Child.
“Wake up, Kate. I know Mr. Jacks does not want you to go but you must! I have packed you some things for your journey, here,” she handed a confused Kate a toothbrush and some clothes. “Take this and change, brush your teeth and go to the bathroom! But be very quiet and do not wake up Mr. Jacks!”
Ten minutes later, she came down to a dark kitchen to find Child sitting at the table.
“I have water, food, a flashlight, batteries, some clothes, and mirror in this bag here for you. I have thought about it, and you can use my truck to get there,” said Child.
Kate stared at her and stammered,“ I...I have no idea how to thank you!”
“Thank me by getting those people out of there,” she said with a smile. “Now come with me and listen, you know where the force field is, so just go in that direction. Here is a jacket and a blanket, will you be warm enough?” Kate smiled again as she thought of her mom. Child opened the door to the garage and they walked inside.
“I will be fine thank you so much for all that you have done, but what about Mr. Jacks?”
“Oh, don’t worry about Jacky, I will take care of him. Now be safe and visit me sometime after you get everyone out, okay?” she said as her eyes began to fill with tears. She handed Kate the keys. “It’s a good thing that I had my temps when I left!” Kate thought.
“I will, bye now until next time!” she said as she got in the car and turned the key. As she backed out the garage she waved at Child, and then drove off with the jacket on her, the bag full of mirrors, and the blanket on the seat next to her. The clock read 3:23 a.m. she thought that she might get there around five thirty in the morning.
“Don’t worry, here I come with even more mirrors and I will get you out.” She said to no one.
Kate drove for about two hours before spotting the force field. It looked like a great big plastic dome, with the morning sun shining off of it. But at the bottom of the dome she saw many black dots moving around on both sides of the dome. “Were the people waiting for the force field to go away, and then help the people on the inside when it did? Good,” Kate thought. “But would they would have enough food and water for them when it did?” When Kate got closer she saw that she was right, there was a water tank with plastic cups stacked all around it. There were at least ten big food trucks for the people. As she got even closer, a man in a yellow vest stopped her.
“Excuse me miss, but just where do you think you are going?” he asked.
“I’m...er...I’m going to see my twin! Yeah, my sister Kate Borne is inside there and I am here for her.”
“Okay then you can go through.”
Kate could not believe her luck, the man let her drive up to the very front so that she was only feet away from the force field when she parked the truck. She could see the people on the other side looking back at her and then she saw---
“Darby!” Kate yelled as she ran to the force field. “Darby can you hear me?” Darby looked at her in amazement. She stared to ask her something that Kate could not hear because all that She could see was her mouth moving and nothing more. Apparently sound could not get through.Then Kate had an idea.
“Hey everybody!” She yelled as she got onto the bed of the truck. “Everyone listen up! I know how to get the people out of there!” People turned their heads to give her surprised and confused looks.
“What do you mean?” asked a woman in a reporter's suit.
“Are you serious?” said a tired looking teenage boy. “My mom is in there and I want her out!”
“I know, I know,” said Kate. “My team is in there and I want them out, too! But listen, I have found a way to get all of the people out of there! Look,” she said as she took out the mirrors from her bag. “All you have to do is put it up to the force field, and a hole will appear that you can go through! But you cannot do it from the outside! You need to be on the inside.”
“So how are you going to get that to the people in there?” asked a man with a curious look on his face.
“Well, I have been thinking about that, and all we have to do is slide it on the ground to them. Does anybody have a paper and pen?” Kate asked the big crowd. When she got a pad of paper and a pen, Kate scribbled the directions on them.
“Okay, I am going to slide this on the ground to that girl,” she said pointing to Darby. “She will take it, use it, and then before anybody gets out some of us have to in.”
There was a lot of whispering among the people. Kate continued, “And then we will going in with some ladders and stand on them to make hole even bigger, everyone understand?” All of the people nodded their heads.
“Great, now I need some volunteers!”
Half of the crowd put their hands up. Kate picked the tallest people, and once they all got a ladder and a mirror, Kate said, “Okay, could everyone back up a little bit please?”
Everyone shuffled back a little bit. Then she hopped down from the truck and walked to where Darby was, looked her in the eye then tapped the mirror and slid it on the ground to her. The entire crowd held their breath. When the mirror got to the other side, and in Darby’s hands safely everyone relaxed. Darby gave her a confused look at first but then she saw the note and then slowly raised the mirror up to the force field with her eyes squeezed shut. And then a hole appeared. There was cheering on both sides.
“Kate!” Said Darby as she started to move toward her.
“Wait, Darby you need to stay there! Okay, people with mirrors and ladders go in!” The people started to go in through Darby’s small hole and started to set up the ladders.
“Kate, what are they doing?” Asked Darby.
“Just watch!” The people began to climb the ladders and one by one they slowly put their mirrors up to the force field, and one by one holes in the force field appeared.
“Yes!” Kate yelled with glee. “It’s working!” People began to file out with smiles on their faces.
She even spotted some people from her team and people that she had been in the plane with.
Two hours later.
Kate was exhausted. She had been standing with her arm in the air for about an hour until someone else took the mirror for her, but even then she did not get a break, there was the matter of handing out food and cups of water to the hungry people. She didn't even get to see her team, but after all there was a lot of work to do.
“I want a nap.” Kate thought in her head.
“Kate, Kate!” said Mr. Smith, the chief who had been hired to hand out food in his food truck. They had been working together for the past forty five minutes. “Kate, do you need a break, you look very tired and anyway we are close to the end of the line.”
“Okay thanks Mr. Smith.” Kate walked by the people smile to herself, they were all free now. A lot of the people smiled back.
“KATE!”
Kate turned around and could not believe her eyes.
“MOM!” Kate hugged her mom, remembering how much she missed her. “Mom, what are you doing here?”
“Well, when I heard that you were in the force field I came as soon as I could! But the traffic, oh the traffic, it was murder! There were so many people who were also coming up! But, anyway, I am here now. Tell me how you got out!”
She never did get to tell her Mom, that because all of a sudden her team was suffocating her with hugs.
“Kate!” yelled Darby. “I was so worried when I did not see you anywhere! We thought that you died!” “Tell us how you got out!” Her team demanded.
“Okay, okay!” And then she began to tell them how she got out and how she and Mr. Jacks met Child. And how Mr. Jacks did not want to go back and get them out. At this part in her story, they all asked things like, “did he really say that he did not want to come back to us?” or “do you think that he will still be coaching us after this?” Her mother was furious that he had made Kate go alone; to which, she said that he did not make her go alone, she just left him.
When she was done with telling them everything it was about noon and she remembered Childs truck.
“Um, uh, mom?” Kate began.
“Yes Kate?”
“I just remembered that I need to bring Child her truck back, do you think that we could go back right now?”
“Are you sure?”
“Yes, I think that it’s her only vehicle.”
“Okay, then I will drive behind you. But we have to get home as soon as possible!”
“Great! Thank you mom! You will love Child.” And as she was driving to Child’s she thought how she could not wait to get home, she missed her family and friends. If Mr. Jacks was right about one thing, it was that home was the best place to be!
